Archive for year: 2019

I was moved to do the podcast this week on health because I have, over the years, been working in some buildings that are hospitals, care homes or respite that do not feel healthy. We have a local hospital that is made of concrete and each time I go in it I wonder how anyone could ever get better it there because it feel so heavy. Ed and were talking about different environments and the effects that they might have on our health. But ‘sick building’ syndrome, as it is known does not only effect the physical body it also effects the emotional self. We know that when people feel good their immune system is more robust and their ability to get better is enhanced. I am left wondering how much of what we call anxiety and depression might be more environmental than we realise.

After all in a world where at least 60% of people suffer anxiety, 45% report being stressed and 45 million working days are lost each year to stress and anxiety we just might consider doing something about it. If some of this is environmental is it necessary to reach for medication or can we learn to moderate our wellbeing and health in other ways.

It would be good if we could get out of the building that we work in more but sadly this  is seldom the case. In many ways we are stuck. So what can we do to lift our mood and try to bolster our immune system?

It has to start here and now because in the now, in the moment, there is no depression, no anxiety and nothing to worry about. If we can let go of what was and not worry about what will be we might feel a whole size happier. The suggestion below could enhance your ability to be in the moment not in a depressive past or an anxious future. They are all also a way of increasing the happy endorphins in your brain, which also has the effect of keeping you younger for longer and building your immune defences. 

Use the time that you do have in non stressful ways. 

How long does it take you to get to work? On that journey are you living in the present being relaxed and easy with yourself or are you winding up for a difficult day? How about you use that time to listen to music, an audio book or, if you are on public transport, actually read a book. Or maybe you takes Ed’s advise and get on a bike.

Mindful meditation. 

We know that just 10 minutes a day of focussed mindful quiet time can change your life. It is the practiced application of living in the present. The ten minutes begins to seep into the rest of your day calming and relaxing your life.

Relaxing pastimes and hobbies

Painting a picture, cooking a meal, knitting a jumper, the list becomes endless. When you focus on a project, whatever it is, your ability to worry becomes diminished as you focus into the moment. What have you done for you in the last week to make you feel good? If the answer is nothing then it is time to change and begin to look after yourself.

Doing good things for others

Doing things that make other people happy has the magic effect of making you feel better and increasing the happy endorphins in your brain. It might just be making someone a cup of coffee or helping an older person carry their shopping, a good turn to others is a good turn for yourself.

Leave work at work

In occupational health we talk a lot about work life balance. The evening review, in the mindfulness toolkit, (free on the site) stops the negative issues of work spilling over into home life. End you work day positively and leave the stress of work at work.

Get physical 

If you raise your heart rate for as little as twenty minutes your brain will respond by releasing a wave of happy hormones. It doesn’t need to be a gym, a short run or a brisk walk will do the trick. It will also keep your musculoskeletal and cardiovascular systems in order.

 

Animal love

Not for everyone but having a pet, usually a cat or a dog is a fabulous way to reduce anxiety and stress. Having another being to look after can create a meaningful sense of purpose and help with depression. The act of stroking or petting can reduce blood pressure and calm your system and the added need to walk your dog can help with your physical exercise as well.

Nobody wants anything and nobody needs anything

Taking time out just for you. Sometime that is all about you. What you need and what you want to do. It could be a hobby, could be a Zumba class or a bath with candles and music. When did you last do something just for you?

Stress is in the eye of the beholder

The psychological concept is that “thoughts become things”, “the things that you think about you bring about” means that what you focus on will get ever bigger in your conscious awareness, “what you feed grows and what you starve dies”. In neuropsychology we know that for most of us the ability to be happy or depressed, stressed or relaxed, anxious or calm, is a choice. We choose what we focus on every moment of everyday. If we feed good thoughts we have good experiences and if we feed bad thoughts we have negative experiences. It is our choice.

Make your choices today ones of calm relaxed happiness.

Take care

Sean x

I wanted to cover this topic as this weeks podcast and blog because I am worried about the state of things. Over the days as we record this and it goes out on the internet a variety of things will have taken place in the UK parliament. It maybe that the government is defeated and that we are heading for a general election. It could be that Boris Johnson forces through his no deal Brexit and that we crash out of the EU. Or it could be the start of severe civil unrest that could ultimately lead to an active or a covert civil war. I am not being dramatic in my observations. 

We are in a situation where the government is prepared to, and plans to, suspend parliament so that they can force through their intentions without opposition or debate. Now, call me old fashioned but, when I was a kid this was called a dictatorship and is a gross dereliction of the democratic process. Any other dictatorial government, anywhere in the world, that had dared to do such a thing would have been descried from the roof tops and exposed as pariahs and cheats. Hey, guess what?, we are now one of those countries currently governed by the non elected Dictator Johnson.

This is a quote from my resource for this  weeks podcast.

In many established democracies, the descent towards dictatorship is becoming a real threat. In this light, we need to consider two urgent questions: Can dictators in the making be “cured”? And can we prevent dictators from assuming power?  

I’m afraid that the response to the first question is: “not likely”. Historical experience has proven otherwise. From a clinical perspective, most psychotherapists believe that dictators (with their psychopathic traits) tend to be untreatable. Thus, many opposing powers are needed to address the second question on how to prevent their ascension.

Prevention is better than cure, so we need to recognise potential dictators before they stealthily compromise and destroy our lives. Once they are in power, it is often too late.

Read more

We have often mentioned the issue of psycho-pathology and socio-pathology in previous episodes. The pathology bit means someone who acts without insight or empathy. These people would also often be narcissistic and sometimes borderline personalities. In simple short hand psychopaths are born like it and have a certain type of brain structure and genome that make it virtually impossible for them to change. A sociopath is someone who has learned to act like that, often due to their underlying narcissism, abuse and unresolved inner conflicts. Sociopaths can change, though it takes a lot of emotional and practical resources for this to happen.

In our current situation globally we are in the grip of the successful psychopaths such as Johnson, Trump, Putin, Kim Jong and so on. This is not dissimilar to the set up before the Second World War where there was Hitler, Mussolini, Stalin, Chiang Kai-shek, Hirohito and so on. These dictators with their narcissistic intolerance, ignorance and xenophobia created the inevitability of the Second World War in which it is estimated that 85 million people died.   

Is the same thing about to happen all over again?

I come back to my life time mantra…

If we all look after each other we will all be okay.

We seem to be someway away from that right now. 

The Earth and Mother Nature is being assailed from many directions at this time. There is climate change, global warming, rising see levels, increase carbon dioxide, burning forests, increased pollution, plastics interfering with the ecosystems, super drug resistant bugs, over population of human beings. There is a tipping point where it, where we, become unsustainable. I suspect that that point is a lot closer than we think.

So, stay aware over the next few weeks. The world of the Brits, and as a consequence the rest of the world, could change dramatically. Let us hope that it is for the better!

Take care 

Sean x

I have just been reviewing and editing my new book, that will be published next year. “Out Of The Blue”. I was going over the part about free will. It seem very relevant that I am now writing this blog. One of the big issues that I deal with in the consulting room is the ‘what shall I do with my life?’, question. Or the same things from the other way around is ‘why does this always happen to me?’ This raises the issue of is life predetermined or is it something that we create? Are we the victim of circumstances or the author of our own fate.

I live in a world that takes into account neuroplasticity but also psycho-spiritual-plasticity. I think that we all, at any age and at any time, have the ability and the capacity to change, grow and develop. I do not believe that life is predetermined. I know that we have choice. These choices effect us all. We may be on a path of learning that can make it feel that it is predetermined but unless we are aware and awake we will miss the opportunities and the lessons that are presented to us. In a very real sense it is never what happens it us that is important it is how we respond to what happens to us that counts.

Right now planet Earth is in crisis, that is a crisis of our own making. It may be that our ecological mismanagement catches up with us, it maybe that we plunge into another world war or die from pollution and lack of oxygen. If we wake a little and use the other option of choice we might just choose piece and act in ways that reverse the adverse pollution that we have inflicted on the planet. This would suggest that I do not see life as predetermined but I do us as the authors that do have choices.

If life is not predetermined it would also suggest that to have an aim or a direction might be a good thing that can take us nearer to where we want to be because we are enacting our choice. So from my point of view a plan of action is a good thing. The problem is that most people do not know what it is that they want or need to do. So I have suggestions as to how we might discover what that is.

The first is the classic of projecting forward to your hundredth birthday, there is a reception and someone is calling assembled throng to silence because they want to say a few words about you and your life. What would you like them to be saying? If you were to write that speech right now it might give you some pointers as to what you need to do with your life to fill in the space between now and then. This is your plan.

The second is to honestly look ate your life and the lives of those around you, maybe check the media and do some googling. What things that observe catch your attention? What things do or would make you feel good if you did them? There is a seed of a plan here. If you do things that make you feel good you will live a happy life that will take you towards your own fulfilment.

The third is to meditate. We can spend so much time asking the question of what should we do that we never shut up long enough to hear the answer to the question. When we are quiet in meditation we may begin within a question. If we are then quiet and listen the answer can come to us ‘out of the Blue’ so to speak. This can be the beginning of the plan.

Over all planning things that make you feel happy leads to a happy life. This is the enactment of choice. Being a victim of circumstances does lead to happiness.

Take care and plan well

Sean x

OMG it has actually happened. I thought that somewhere along the line people would wake up and reject this idea. May has departed and BOJO has arrived and amazingly Trumpy says that BOJO is the British Trump and that we all love him….help….!!!!

Somebody once said something like, ‘those that want to be leaders should never be allowed to do so’. This was something that I didn’t really understand until I began working with managers. Oh my, there are some awful managers out there and many of them are supposed to be looking after our health and our wellbeing. I now feel that those that want to be leaders should be automatically banned immediately from applying. 

There is a part of me that feels we should just stop talking about Brexit, after all what is the point?  There is also the part of me that is both intrigued and annoyed with it all. I am appalled at what a total mess our leaders have made of the whole Brexit business from Cameron onwards. We have had disaster after disaster. May seemed so weak. Corbyn on the opposite bench has just been avoidant. Now we are in such a sad state and we now have yet another leader and we still haven’t resolved Brexit.  The big question will BOJO be able to do so?

I am very clear that I think Brexit is one of the stupidest things we could possibly do. I do not think that the EU is perfect and I believe that it needs reforming and developing. However the idea of people coming together and working together makes total sense to me and fulfils the aims of the European project that is creating the peace and not yet another war.

As I watch the mad people take over the asylum we have Putin, BoJo, Trumpy and Kim. The egos of the world have come out to play. Trump has managed to get Iran stretching its muscle and Korea is wondering what to do next. The Chinese are at financial war with Trump and most of the Arab world has turned its back on Qatar. I could go on but I will climb off this hobby horse.

Okay, to me to looks like this, leaders by definition should be there to lead. With a big bit of hope and a good wind they may will lead us in a positive direction. The problem is that to be a positive leader you need to have insight and empathy. Around me I can not a see a single leader who has insight and empathy.

The spectrum of psychopathy begins with those around us who lack insight and empathy and are generally insensitive people and ends with murderers, mass murders and, sad to say, some politicians. For someone to say something or tweet something and then completely deny that they did, does not suggest a person with insight. To feel able to lie about the funds that would supposedly be freed from EU contributions and used to save the NHS does not suggest insight. And to be a socialist leader who has got splinters in their bottom because they are unable to get off the fence does not suggest insight.

I think that we are in the era of the successful psychopaths and they are now taking power. Because these psychopathic traits of insensitive leadership are gaining in popularity they are now on the rise. We find them in organisations and the public services at all levels of management and leadership. This draconian approach to social interaction and management moves clearly away from the socialist models that developed after the last war with the NHS and the welfare state. This all suggests to me that society, in the normal ebbs and flows of social change, is lurching to the right. When this happens it can so easily lead to fascism, nationalism and isolation. This is exactly where we were, in Europe, before the Second World War. After all that horror ended we thought that we had learned that lesson. It was then that we created the United Nations, and eventually the EU.

This is one of those times in the social cycle when we need a leader to appear. A real leader who has both insight and empathy and can truly represent the ideals of all humanity and not be stuck social or religious factionalism.

My favourite phrase of…

…if we all look a few each other we will all be okay… 

…is needed now, it is just that we need an inspirational leader to lead it!

Take care and be happy. 

Sean x