TSHP329: The Importance of Nature

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What’s Coming This Episode?

How many of us can say that we get enough nature in our lives? Perhaps not many. Do we wait until the weekend to head off to the coast? Till just before bed to take the dog for a walk? Sean and Ed were wondering how we can build into our everyday lives in various ways…

Enjoy the show and take care, it’s The Self Help Podcast!

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Nature

I am looking out of the window of my apartment in Doha Qatar.  Below me the City speeds about and I can see at least a thousand houses. Each house is full of people, thousands of people. The roads are full, sometimes gridlocked, as all these people rush from somewhere to somewhere else. They are all in a frenzied dash that is, for many human beings throughout the world, normal everyday life. I am struck by the overwhelming concept of ‘just how many of us human beings are here living on this planet?’ 

Ed and I were talking about nature, being in nature and living with nature. He has just arranged a family cycling day which attracted over 300 people who took their cycles on private tracks through a private estate. The families were riding through the woods in touch with nature. Also that day it rained quite a bit, so there was a lot of mud! It seems that this just added to the fun and that sense of being free and in the woods with nature.

It can be hard in a desert that is distinctly beige to feel connected to nature. I am used to the European landscapes of rolling green hills and mellow fruitfulness. The sandy colours seem so flat. I also realise that people living in very hot countries do not go outside very much. If I walk from here to the store it is exactly one kilometre which would be no big deal in the UK but in 45 degrees with 80% humidity it can feel quite a task.

Talking to Ed and looking out of the window makes me realise how easy it is to lose touch with nature. We seem to have become pretty clever at creating artificial environments to be in. So here in the Middle East we go from the air conditioned apartment to the air conditioned car. On work days we then go from the air conditioned car to air conditioned office. At the weekends we go from the air conditioned car to the air conditioned shopping mall and all the time we hardly touch nature at all.

But the same is also true in Europe. We have created our artificial living environments with double glazing and central heating. In one part of the world we have created a way of living where we go inside to get out of the heat while in another part of the world we go inside to get away from the cold. Either way we have ceased to live with nature.

I am struck by the idea that should the electricity fail so that we could no long cool or heat our living spaces we would shortly die out. I suspect that we have become so removed from nature that we would no longer know how to live and survive without the technology that surrounds us.

The technology is really great. It created the iPad that I am typing this on and the recording facilities that we record the podcast on. It will also have created what device you read this or listen to the podcast on but, without electricity all of this, all of our lives and our well being would come to an immediate end. With global warming if we all retreated to the woods and lit fires to survive we would just make the situation worse. I agree that we need to get back to nature but we need to get back on her terms not ours. My fear is that we have become to disassociated from nature that we no longer really understand what our relationship should be. The only people left on the planet who would understand this are the Amazonian Indians who, as hunter gatherers, are in and with nature every day. Sadly these poor souls, who may have the key to our survival, are being displaced and having their environment degraded and destroyed by the mad rush to clear what is left of the rain forest. 

I have a feeling that decisions about our future on this planet will, if they have not already, be taken out of our hands. Mother Nature is a nice girl unless you cross her and then she gets her own back. The loss of the dinosaurs or any of the other mass extinctions that have happened throughout the life of this planet are Mother Nature simply re-establishing a balance.

So my message is, for each of us to stop and have a think about what it is we can do to stop the destruction. No matter how big or small it all helps! Oh and spend more time in nature 🙂

Take care

Sean x

TSHP328: How Does Nudging Work?

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What’s Coming This Episode?

Humans. Sure, they’re funny, caring, etc. Some are even quite pleasant to live with BUT they sure can be stubborn sometimes, hey? All of the data, proof and hard times in the world just won’t shift (some of) them. An answer might be at hand, though – nudging! Let’s talk about the lost art of the nudge…

Enjoy the show and take care, it’s The Self Help Podcast!

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Nudge Theory

Nudging is the art of persuasion that is carried out below someone’s awareness. This  is mainly used in health and safety areas as we encourage people to look after themselves. The rumble strips as you approach a roundabout get closer and closer together giving you the sensation that your car is speeding up. Your natural reaction is to slow down. No one has told you to slow down or asked you to slow down, you have simply been nudged below you awareness into an action that makes you and other people safer.

In the game of life we all seek to nudge others into doing what it is that we need them to do. If we are subtle they will not realise that they are being nudged. Many people get outraged at these ideas and ask me where nudging ends and manipulation begins? Perhaps the issue is in the eye of the beholder, as I say we are all doing it anyway. Perhaps manipulation is more negative and nudging more positive.

A while ago when we were looking at persuasion I suggested other words that we might use or think of instead of persuasion such as teaching, training, encouragement, seduction, inducement, punishment, cajolery, extortion, manipulation, coercion, bullying, brainwashing, exhortation, fear… I am sure there are more. Perhaps we then need also to consider the common vehicles that are used for persuasion such as media, news, propaganda, prejudice, gossip, faith, belief and our good friend advertising.

The Negative Bias

Evolutionary psychology explains that as we, indeed all beings on the planet, evolved we learned pretty early on that staying safe was a very good idea. This meant that we learned to pay more attention to the painful scary things than to the pleasurable things. This is known in psychology as the negative bias. We all know people who catastrophize events, make mountains out of mole hills and always see the worst possible outcomes, they are simply playing out the evolutionary negative bias to keep them self and those that they care about safe.

It seems strange that the negative message should be more powerful and create more attention than the positive one. Just turn on the news and see this being played out. Simply ask yourself ‘why is news always about bad things happening? Why don’t we pay as much attention to the good news as to the bad?’ The bad news is potentially telling us about things that may threaten us and from an evolutionary point of view this was more important than being happy.

Security and behaviour

Our behaviour is based around our need for security, for our need  to feel safe or normal. This make us vulnerable to be nudged by any message that might make use feel insecure or threatened.

As you will realise my current hobby horse is Brexit. The Brexit movement was all about nudging people with the feeling of fear and threat. When the statement that we would be able to put £350 million back into the NHS it was not talking to our positive self as in ‘oh that is good we will have more money for health’ we heard the message with our negative bias, ‘Those Europeans are stealing our resources’. This plays right back to the evolutionary negative bias it is as though the tribes in the neighbouring territories are stealing our food and resources. The natural response is to move away from the source of the threat,

Now, if I say ‘if we leave Europe it is the stupidest thing we could ever do. We will all suffer, be worse off and create more instability in the world that leads to wars, death and violence…’ all of which I do believe by the way, what I have done is just attempted to nudge you into voting ‘stay’ in the next referendum b y appealing to your negative bias. If I were to appeal to the positive side of your nature and tell what wonderful people the Europeans are and how much we benefit from being involved with them, the message does not have them same impact.

Nudging and persuading is what we are all doing all the time, if not with others then with ourself. How do you nudge yourself to go to the gym when you are feeling like you can’t be bothered?

Mindfulness is the only option that we have to become truly aware of who we are and what we are doing and also to be aware of others and what exactly they are up to. My stuck phrase is ‘what is the sound behind their words? What do they really mean when they said that?’

In mindful awareness we life in a world of choice and if we are Being nudged we might choose to enjoy it and see where it takes us. After all life is about learning?

Take care and be happy (that is a nudge by the way)

Sean X (so is the X that infers that I care without actually saying it)

TSHP327: How to heal

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What’s Coming This Episode?

How do you heal your body? Pop to the chemist? A trip to the doctor? This episode comes with a bit of a disclaimer, but we need to have a chat about how quick we are to reach for the medication. Painkillers mask the pain, they don’t remove it. Let’s have a chat about healing…

Enjoy the show and take care, it’s The Self Help Podcast!

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Healing

I was moved to do the podcast this week on health because I have, over the years, been working in some buildings that are hospitals, care homes or respite that do not feel healthy. We have a local hospital that is made of concrete and each time I go in it I wonder how anyone could ever get better it there because it feel so heavy. Ed and were talking about different environments and the effects that they might have on our health. But ‘sick building’ syndrome, as it is known does not only effect the physical body it also effects the emotional self. We know that when people feel good their immune system is more robust and their ability to get better is enhanced. I am left wondering how much of what we call anxiety and depression might be more environmental than we realise.

After all in a world where at least 60% of people suffer anxiety, 45% report being stressed and 45 million working days are lost each year to stress and anxiety we just might consider doing something about it. If some of this is environmental is it necessary to reach for medication or can we learn to moderate our wellbeing and health in other ways.

It would be good if we could get out of the building that we work in more but sadly this  is seldom the case. In many ways we are stuck. So what can we do to lift our mood and try to bolster our immune system?

It has to start here and now because in the now, in the moment, there is no depression, no anxiety and nothing to worry about. If we can let go of what was and not worry about what will be we might feel a whole size happier. The suggestion below could enhance your ability to be in the moment not in a depressive past or an anxious future. They are all also a way of increasing the happy endorphins in your brain, which also has the effect of keeping you younger for longer and building your immune defences. 

Use the time that you do have in non stressful ways. 

How long does it take you to get to work? On that journey are you living in the present being relaxed and easy with yourself or are you winding up for a difficult day? How about you use that time to listen to music, an audio book or, if you are on public transport, actually read a book. Or maybe you takes Ed’s advise and get on a bike.

Mindful meditation. 

We know that just 10 minutes a day of focussed mindful quiet time can change your life. It is the practiced application of living in the present. The ten minutes begins to seep into the rest of your day calming and relaxing your life.

Relaxing pastimes and hobbies

Painting a picture, cooking a meal, knitting a jumper, the list becomes endless. When you focus on a project, whatever it is, your ability to worry becomes diminished as you focus into the moment. What have you done for you in the last week to make you feel good? If the answer is nothing then it is time to change and begin to look after yourself.

Doing good things for others

Doing things that make other people happy has the magic effect of making you feel better and increasing the happy endorphins in your brain. It might just be making someone a cup of coffee or helping an older person carry their shopping, a good turn to others is a good turn for yourself.

Leave work at work

In occupational health we talk a lot about work life balance. The evening review, in the mindfulness toolkit, (free on the site) stops the negative issues of work spilling over into home life. End you work day positively and leave the stress of work at work.

Get physical 

If you raise your heart rate for as little as twenty minutes your brain will respond by releasing a wave of happy hormones. It doesn’t need to be a gym, a short run or a brisk walk will do the trick. It will also keep your musculoskeletal and cardiovascular systems in order.

 

Animal love

Not for everyone but having a pet, usually a cat or a dog is a fabulous way to reduce anxiety and stress. Having another being to look after can create a meaningful sense of purpose and help with depression. The act of stroking or petting can reduce blood pressure and calm your system and the added need to walk your dog can help with your physical exercise as well.

Nobody wants anything and nobody needs anything

Taking time out just for you. Sometime that is all about you. What you need and what you want to do. It could be a hobby, could be a Zumba class or a bath with candles and music. When did you last do something just for you?

Stress is in the eye of the beholder

The psychological concept is that “thoughts become things”, “the things that you think about you bring about” means that what you focus on will get ever bigger in your conscious awareness, “what you feed grows and what you starve dies”. In neuropsychology we know that for most of us the ability to be happy or depressed, stressed or relaxed, anxious or calm, is a choice. We choose what we focus on every moment of everyday. If we feed good thoughts we have good experiences and if we feed bad thoughts we have negative experiences. It is our choice.

Make your choices today ones of calm relaxed happiness.

Take care

Sean x

TSHP326: Control, Power and Dictatorships

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What’s Coming This Episode?

Leadership is a funny thing. A tricky balance. Some like their leaders strong. Some like them malleable. So how should we lead? How do dictatorships arise and can they be effective whilst remaining humane?

Enjoy the show and take care, it’s The Self Help Podcast!

Show Notes and Links

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Dictators and Psychopaths

I wanted to cover this topic as this weeks podcast and blog because I am worried about the state of things. Over the days as we record this and it goes out on the internet a variety of things will have taken place in the UK parliament. It maybe that the government is defeated and that we are heading for a general election. It could be that Boris Johnson forces through his no deal Brexit and that we crash out of the EU. Or it could be the start of severe civil unrest that could ultimately lead to an active or a covert civil war. I am not being dramatic in my observations. 

We are in a situation where the government is prepared to, and plans to, suspend parliament so that they can force through their intentions without opposition or debate. Now, call me old fashioned but, when I was a kid this was called a dictatorship and is a gross dereliction of the democratic process. Any other dictatorial government, anywhere in the world, that had dared to do such a thing would have been descried from the roof tops and exposed as pariahs and cheats. Hey, guess what?, we are now one of those countries currently governed by the non elected Dictator Johnson.

This is a quote from my resource for this  weeks podcast.

In many established democracies, the descent towards dictatorship is becoming a real threat. In this light, we need to consider two urgent questions: Can dictators in the making be “cured”? And can we prevent dictators from assuming power?  

I’m afraid that the response to the first question is: “not likely”. Historical experience has proven otherwise. From a clinical perspective, most psychotherapists believe that dictators (with their psychopathic traits) tend to be untreatable. Thus, many opposing powers are needed to address the second question on how to prevent their ascension.

Prevention is better than cure, so we need to recognise potential dictators before they stealthily compromise and destroy our lives. Once they are in power, it is often too late.

Read more

We have often mentioned the issue of psycho-pathology and socio-pathology in previous episodes. The pathology bit means someone who acts without insight or empathy. These people would also often be narcissistic and sometimes borderline personalities. In simple short hand psychopaths are born like it and have a certain type of brain structure and genome that make it virtually impossible for them to change. A sociopath is someone who has learned to act like that, often due to their underlying narcissism, abuse and unresolved inner conflicts. Sociopaths can change, though it takes a lot of emotional and practical resources for this to happen.

In our current situation globally we are in the grip of the successful psychopaths such as Johnson, Trump, Putin, Kim Jong and so on. This is not dissimilar to the set up before the Second World War where there was Hitler, Mussolini, Stalin, Chiang Kai-shek, Hirohito and so on. These dictators with their narcissistic intolerance, ignorance and xenophobia created the inevitability of the Second World War in which it is estimated that 85 million people died.   

Is the same thing about to happen all over again?

I come back to my life time mantra…

If we all look after each other we will all be okay.

We seem to be someway away from that right now. 

The Earth and Mother Nature is being assailed from many directions at this time. There is climate change, global warming, rising see levels, increase carbon dioxide, burning forests, increased pollution, plastics interfering with the ecosystems, super drug resistant bugs, over population of human beings. There is a tipping point where it, where we, become unsustainable. I suspect that that point is a lot closer than we think.

So, stay aware over the next few weeks. The world of the Brits, and as a consequence the rest of the world, could change dramatically. Let us hope that it is for the better!

Take care 

Sean x