Did you really just say that?
Do you listen to what you say? Do you hear the tone of your voice? Are you aware of how others hear you? I guess if your answer to these questions were ‘no’ then you would not be reading this. However, becoming really aware of what is coming out of our mouths is an art and requires awareness and awake-ness.
You only need to stand in a bus queue or sit in a coffee lounge and listen the voices around you to realise where people hold their consciousness. Sadly you will discover that the majority of what people are saying is negative. There are many reasons for this but the bottom line is that for some people they live with negative images and beliefs about themselves and about others.
From being children we have learned all that we know from what we heard and what we saw. In the beginning this was from our mother and our father and that went on to siblings, teachers, cultures and nationalities and so on. And we have gone on repeating all that we have learned again and again and again.
The problem is that what you say is what you hear, and what you hear reinforces your basic beliefs. If you see negative things in other people and you verbalise your negative thought you will hear those negative thoughts and simply continue to have more negative thoughts.
You will never find happiness or contentment
while you have negative thoughts about other people
The two things can never go together. If you say anything negative about another person, and you hear what you have just said, you have simply added another little pebble to the negative mountain inside you. If on the other hand you have a positive thought about another person it is as though you have just taken a little pebble off the mountain. Many positive thoughts will rid you of the burden of negativity that you carry around with you.
You can always tell negative people because they find it hard to say anything that is positive. If it’s sunny they will be expecting rain, if it is raining they will be expecting a flood. They will suffer illnesses, bad luck and assume, in someway, that the universe is out to get them, they will feel that people don’t like them and become distrustful.
Thoughts become things
The magic of thoughts is that they precede words. When you think a thought you do not need to say it, to allow it to have its effect. If you have good thoughts you will take the pebbles away from the negative mountain and lighten your load. If on the other hand you spend your time ruminating on negative thoughts you will add to the mountain and the burden that you are carrying.
There are particular words that add greatly to the negative mountain. These will include most swear words and profanities. The word ‘can’t’ should be banned completely because if you say that you can’t, you hear it and it is a done deal. If someone says, “I can’t do that” they are right they can’t.
The other words that do not serve us well are ‘ought’, ‘should’ and ‘must’. The only reason we ever need to act is because we want or desire to do something. There is nothing that we ought to do, there is nothing that we should do and, there is nothing that we must do. The only relevant action is that of free choice.
Just as you hear what you say other people hear what you say. When you are negative with there people you simply are adding to the negative mountain within them. When you act with kindness and love you are lightening their load. In all forms of therapy and healing it is the acceptance by the therapist with unconditional positive regard of the person that they are working with that does the healing.
When we use thoughts and words that treat us with unconditional positive regard we feed our self with the highest positive emotions, we develop self-confidence, happiness and love. We allow our self to enjoy the magic of being alive.
But the world is full of choices. Listen to yourself. If what you are saying makes you feel good then, say more of it. If, on the other hand, it makes you feel not so good, then change your script.
Be happy and love what comes out of your mouth.