How do you feel when other people don’t do what you want them to or, they let you down? Do you blame them or yourself? It’s time to tak about the blame game…
It is so easy to blame other people for your own problems, angers and frustration. You can become irritated with people who do not do things the way that you want. You may see them as stupid, rude, incompetent, inconsiderate, and so on. But, is the problem theirs or yours?
The only thing in life that you will ever be able to change is yourself. What other people do and the reasons why they do it make sense to them. The outcome of their actions are their responsibility. This is what we call karma, the result of the actions.
Equally, you are responsible for your actions, and also your reactions. This is your karma. Being responsible for yourself means letting go of your expectations of others and not hanging onto the outcomes that you want.
Attachments are fixed connections to past expectations
Cravings are attachments to future expectations
Being attached to or craving a desired outcome is a recipe for disappointment that can leave you feeling angry, offended, hurt or disappointed. The simple truth is that in all of your interactions with others if you had not had an expectation in the first place you would not have been disappointed.
Allowing people to be what they are reduces your stress
The law of allowing is a magical thing that allows you to be who and what you are at the same time allowing others to be who and what they are.
If you don’t like what is happening change yourself
If you feel let down or disappointed by someone’s behaviour then your expectation of that person was wrong. If you want to feel different then change your expectation of that person.
Blame may not be that helpful
I don’t like the concepts of fault and blame, they do not really help us very much. I prefer the concept of responsibility that suggest the ability to respond -respondability. If you are responsible for the way that you feel, without the need to blame others, you cease to be a victim of other peoples problems and become the author of your own destiny.
Without blame you have power. Enjoy your power and be happy.